February is associated with love. What is the role of self- love in Heart Health? Whitney Houston had a beautiful strong voice, and I am saddened by her death. While musically I enjoy “The Greatest of Love of All,” I‘m not sure that “Learning to love yourself, it is the greatest love of all” is really true. Starting with the premise that self-love is necessary to love others then it is the base. However, narcissistic love of self does not really serve anyone well. The power of love is that it allows us to go beyond ourselves for another and to stretch beyond our comfort zones. Love in the service of …
When you found out about your cardiac risk factors or your heart disease, you may have blamed yourself, and gotten stuck in guilt, anger or depression. Perhaps you’re so stuck in emotion that you can’t act on your behalf. You may be so caught up in judgement that you view yourself negatively and as unworthy. There may be others who love you, and are willing to support you in making changes, but the necessary changes have to be made by you.
So back to self- love, is it necessary? Personally I think what is needed is compassionate acceptance or acknowledgement of your situation, experience the emotions not just talk about them, notice what is going on with you and look at the risk factors. Through experiencing, even the uncomfortable, and acknowledging what is, you can begin to move forward.
For you, does acknowledgement and moving forward toward a better and healthier life require loving yourself? If so, what are you doing to express this love for self?
If you don’t feel self- love now, what are you are you doing to reduce your risks for further cardiac events?
In either case, if this is a challenging area for you, I would be happy to accompany you with compassion while you explore what is, so that you can move forward to a life you desire.
Dina
203 744-YOU3 (9683)
Hi, Dina,
I loved your column. Extreme self-love to the exclusion of being concerned with the well-being of others, is outright destructive narcism. But the acceptance of one’s life circumstances as being part of one’s reality is needed in order to seek increased wellness. Beyond that, self-acceptance is always helpful, as it drives us to better physical and emotional health. Self-rejection has the opposite effect and inevitably sours our relationship with others to boot! That’s why it’s so vital to speak to people “heart-to-heart” in an empathic, open and loving way.
We’re certainly in agreement. Dina